The My Car Is Faster Than Yours Douchebag Thread

Okay... I never race on the street but this was an exception. Sorry for the novel but I have to get this off my chest.

I pulled into a gas station to fill up on corn juice and this ignorant muscle car jerk in a Roush Mustang cornered me an started bashing my car. He mad fun of my canards and my lip and my hood and called it a ricer with a fart cannon exhaust.

I was a little intimidated at first because this guy was 6.5 and his neck was bigger than my head. So I swallowed my intimidation and went right for the jugular and the conversation went something like this.

Me:
"Listen you ignorant goon. I?ve been in this game since I was 16 and you were just a bad porn away from being conceived. I've had just about every muscle car you can think of and the ones I did not, I have driven at least once. I will tell you that none of them can hold a candle to this car."

Him:
What... you think because you throw some stickers on you car and some tacky carbon fiber, you suddenly have a race car? Do you know what I got?

Me:
Yeah... and overpriced Mustang GT and not a good one at that. For what you paid you could have done much better. Allow me to put this into perspective for you.

Roush Mustang; 435HP supercharged V8, 0-60 in 4.7 sec, 1/4 mile in 13.1, Weight over 3600
Stock 06 STi; 300HP 4cyl turbo, 0-60 in 4.7, ? mile in 13.2, Weight 3263
Even if my car was stock they would be a pretty good match in the ? mile. But I?m not stock which make me believe I?m quicker. While you?re spinning your tires off the line I?m already three car lengths ahead. This is where the similarities end. I have you beat in all other aspects of driving including handling, off road, deep snow and wet weather driving, ECT.

Him:
We?ll see? prove it!

Me:
No! I don?t street race.

Him:
I thought so.

And he walks away. He and his friend get in his car and wait for me to leave. I?m thinking to my self ?I hope all that s**t I just spewed is right otherwise I?m gona look like an a**? Meanwhile the gas station attendant walks up to me and says ?my money is on you bro? Hahah.

So I finally leave and who is behind me? I pull out slowly and keep things civil for the moment and let him get a few ricer fly-by?s out of the way. The whole time his friend is giving me the ?zero? symbol out the window with his hands. We pull up to a light and as I?m waiting I look over at them a smile. I hit the launch control and she revs up to 5200rpm. The light turns green and I?m GONE! I immediately gained 3-4 car lengths on him and he could simply not recover any of it. Just as expected!

We got to the next light and I asked him ?so what happened back there? would you like me to get out and push you off the line?? He says ?he mis-shifted? you know? that old excuse. He then said ?let?s go off a roll, things will be much different then?.

I say ?I?ll bite.?

So we go and @ around forty he gives me three blasts of the horn and goes. To my amazement I was handing this guy his a**.

Embarrassed, he pulls back and does everything in his power to avoid me from this point forward. Well I?m thinking to my self ?Hell no. You are not getting off that easy. You started it by being such a douche now I?m gona finish it.?

I tortured this fool for 45 mins.

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Casper86 said:

Ill admit , I street race quite a bit , but do so in a planned fashion, away from populated areas and never on a whim.
I hate when people talk smack, its soo stupid! Its so funny when someone talks smack, you put buslengths on them and at the next stop/ light they avoid pulling next to you. Its even worse when you encounter those that will talk shit after the fact regaurdless.

I regret it but I love street racing, I dont care if I get beat by a midget on a big wheel I will always throw the thumbs up
and anyone can admit roll racing with lt/ls 1 camaros/ TAs is awsome! even if you lose... the explosive sound from a unrestricted V8 on that third honk is absolutely glorious !

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